Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize