Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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