I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
