Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i dont even know how to be here
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
