you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
