Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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