I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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