Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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