I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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