I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
