Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
