do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
