i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
