I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
