He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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