Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
