What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize