Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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