went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
