He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Come share oat with me in your robe
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize