Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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