It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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