pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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