Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Randomize
