she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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