Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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