I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Randomize
