If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
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