It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
