I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize