dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
