do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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