I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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