I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
