i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
