My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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