guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
