Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
