Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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