so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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