i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize