I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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