I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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