No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize