Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
soo... how was my night?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
