the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
