she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize