I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
As shirtless as possible
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
