4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.