My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
