I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize